Wall Street On The Roof

11 Oct


“Matchmaker, matchmaker, make me a match, find me a find, catch me a catch. Matchmaker, matchmaker, look through your internet online dating site, and make me a perfect match!

So meet Larry Greenfield a very unlucky Wall Street millionaire (see, money does not buy happiness) who at 47, is still single. And he probably still lives with his mother.

Lazar Wolf’s, ahem, sorry, Larry’s problem, is simple. He is trapped in Anatevka. He wants to find a slim, younger lovely jewish girl who has no ambition in life but to cook, clean and gives him daughters -rumor has it he already picked the names- Tzeitel, Chava, Hodel, Bielke and Shprintze.

“Wake up and smell the piroshki!”

Like he is going to find one of those in New York at this time and age.

The most amazing thing is that he has spent $65,000, yes $65,000 and gone to 250 dates to realize that he is just not that good of a catch!

Seriously, I would have charged him half of it, no, lets be honest, I would have been happy with enough money to pay my credit card debt and would tell him the ugly truth straight and forward.

“Larry, you are ugly and you need Rogaine!”- there.

Yup, sadly, money does not buy love, nor happiness…but ahhhhh:

If I were a rich man,
Yubby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dibby dum.
All day long I’d biddy biddy bum.
If I were a wealthy man.
I wouldn’t have to work hard.
Ya ha deedle deedle, bubba bubba deedle deedle dum.
If I were a biddy biddy rich,
Idle-diddle-daidle-daidle man.

But hey, at least I got the looks!

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